Where God's Word Meets Our Mess
I wouldn’t say that I've “arrived.” I don’t have thousands of blog followers—not even close. I haven’t been published on lots of “big” Christian websites like Christianity Today or Desiring God. I don’t have a book proposal ready (or even started, ahem). But I’m here—and "here" is a good place to be because this is where God has brought me. He's the One who helped me say “yes” to this journey.
Sometimes, I just want to walk up to him and ask him the question. I mean, what would he say? I’d love to know how he’d answer if I asked him, "So why don't you like me?"
Honestly, I’m tired of the lectures about not meeting my goals last year. And I’m tired of the lectures about meeting my goals in the upcoming year. Of course, I strongly encourage you to grow in Christ and always be intentional about deepening your faith. But sometimes, I struggle with being told how to live by fallible human beings.
Those scenarios are fictional, but perhaps they feel familiar to you. You may be facing a variety of unexpected situations this Christmas—a breakup, difficult family situation, death of a loved one, financial burden, health issue, church dispute, challenging move, betrayal by a friend, doubts and depression, tension at school, or something else. Christmastime is supposed to be a joyous season, but you don't have any joy right now.
I realize that most people hate the Christmas rush, but I think that it can be a great thing. You know—the rush to buy presents for family members and friends, the rush to watch every Christmas movie possible, the rush to decorate with cute Christmas décor, and the rush to make cards and cookies. The rush to get it all over with. I love the Christmas rush because it helps me escape…but only for so long.
I have a really bad habit of thinking these terrible, mean thoughts. I have a thought life that would make your skin crawl. Why are my thoughts about others so ugly and dirty?
But before the semester ends, I have to survive—and thrive, if possible. Because I have to get through my final papers, presentations, and exams. Yay.
Last year, I wrote about three things that I wasn’t thankful for. For this post, I'm going to share two more things that I’m not thankful for:
The reason my heart hurt was because it seemed like the commenters could only express their feelings in the comments section under my article. Was that the only “safe” place for them to share how they truly felt about guys and relationships? My story of longing and loneliness was their story, too.
Tizzie's Tidbits of Truth 