Though I’d never read Dr. Carolyn Weber’s memoir Surprised by Oxford, I highly anticipated the release of the movie Surprised by Oxford, which was—yup, you guessed it—based on the book. So when I saw it was coming out in theaters for a limited two-day release, I insisted on going to see it. After spending two hours watching a beautiful yet flawed love story unfold, I walked out of the theater feeling a mixture of bliss and disappointment.
Pros…
The star of Surprised by Oxford is Dr. Caroline (Drake) Weber, who found faith—and romance, duh—at Oxford University. In spite of having an emotionally traumatizing experience as a child, she was incredibly bright and passionate. Her love of reading eventually brought her to Oxford University, where she received a full scholarship to pursue her PhD. Soon after Caroline arrived at Oxford, she met a Christian named Kent Weber. (The actor for Kent—Ruari O’Connor—is insanely handsome. His beautiful face alone almost warrants its own “pro” in this post.)
The reason I liked Surprised by Oxford was because of Kent’s beautiful pursuit of Caroline. With the exception of one scene where she ran after his cab to try to keep him from leaving England, the pursuit was perfect.
Kent chased Caroline the entire movie. He wanted to be with her. He wanted her. And he even came back to England for her at the end of the movie. (I won’t spoil all the details, but it was magical.)
But honestly, the why of his pursuit was confusing and unclear. Out of all the girls whom Kent—a Christian—could’ve chosen to pursue, why did he pursue Caroline—a non-Christian?
…and Cons
Caroline wasn’t just a girl who had some doubts about her faith or had strayed from God. She legitimately hated Christians and Christianity. For several months after she met Kent, she treated him poorly. She mocked him for his beliefs—especially his belief sex should be saved for marriage. Props to him for his commitment to purity and for being authentic about his struggle to remain sexually pure. But I simply can’t ignore the fact that he went out of his way to pursue a girl who despised the belief system he claimed to have.
Of course, I realize the movie Surprised by Oxford was based on a book (and the true story it details), so there were limited creative liberties the script writers could take. The movie had to remain true to the book, at least for the most part. But truth be told, I would’ve liked this movie so much more if it’d been about a Christian guy—a pursuer of Christ—who decided to pursue a Christian girl—a fellow pursuer of Christ—so they could pursue Christ together. The romance would’ve been so much sweeter if that had been the case.
The aim of this post isn’t to criticize Kent or Caroline for their past decisions. I genuinely hope they’re both strong believers who are committed to following Jesus together. However, frankly, if two people aren’t pursuing Christ together at the beginning of their relationship, it’s highly unlikely they’ll pursue Him together further along in their relationship. I know too many women who married non-Christians (or Christians who were following Jesus half-heartedly) who ended up sitting in church by themselves Sunday after Sunday after Sunday.
I hope that didn’t happen to Kent and Caroline.
Do I Recommend It?
In my opinion, Surprised by Oxford was worth seeing. And I’d like to see it again because the love story is beautiful (and so is Ruari O’Connor, ahem). However, I do want to offer you this warning: Don’t get so captured by the romance that you fail to think about the messages the movie is sending.
The message you shouldn’t take away from Surprised by Oxford is this: If I date a non-Christian, I’ll be able to convert him or her to Christianity. (That message isn’t biblical—or realistic!) The message you should take away from Surprised by Oxford is this: Make him (i.e., the guy you like, the guy you’re dating, the guy you want to marry, etc.) pursue you. Let him chase you. Don’t make it easy for him. And make sure he’s pursuing Christ, too.
Do not be unequally yoked together with unbelievers. For what fellowship has righteousness with lawlessness? And what communion has light with darkness? And what accord has Christ with Belial? Or what part has a believer with an unbeliever? And what agreement has the temple of God with idols? For you are the temple of the living God. As God has said: “I will dwell in them and walk among them. I will be their God, and they shall be My people.” Therefore “Come out from among them and be separate, says the Lord. Do not touch what is unclean, and I will receive you. I will be a Father to you, and you shall be My sons and daughters, says the Lord Almighty.” (2 Corinthians 6:14-18 NKJV)
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