This post was written by author, speaker, podcaster, and co-founder of Girl Defined Ministries, Bethany Beal, who has written several books for young women. I've consumed so much content from Girl Defined over the years and can't wait for you to read this post written by its co-founder! This post, just like Girl Defined Ministries as a whole, shows girls the truth about their God-given identity.
Dear Ed, let’s rewind a few years, shall we? I know you can remember it. I was 16 years old—a junior in high school trying to figure out her college plans, wanting to grow in her writing craft, and internally panicking about what was ahead. And even though I wasn’t exactly sure how I would get there, I knew that I wanted to be a published author. It had really been my only dream since I was a little girl. But you were willing to do anything and everything to make sure that that dream didn’t become a reality.
You can spot her a mile away—you know, the settler (= the girl who’s settling for a guy who’s very eh). Why does this girl settle for such a loser? He doesn’t love her, let alone care about her. He’s only half-invested in their relationship (if that much). What’s the point of it?
Single Girl, I don’t judge you for any excuse that you’ve made in a desperate attempt to stay inside your comfort zone. But I want you to know that it’s really challenging to meet guys (and do other important things--life's not all about guys) if you stay inside your comfort zone. Please don’t miss the opportunities in front of you simply because they might make you feel a bit un-comfy.
When you were in youth group, you were warned about the dangers of missionary dating. Your youth pastor always said that missionary dating was a slippery slope into an unequally yoked marriage. At the time, you completely agreed with your youth pastor. But then you met [insert the name of your boyfriend].
You did it. You finally lost that weight. You finally ran that marathon. You finally gave up sugar for a month. You finally fit into your dream size. You finally mastered that workout. And yet something doesn't feel right. You still don't love your body. "So," you ask yourself, "since I don't love my body after I've done all this, when will I love my body?" The answer to that question may initially disappoint you, but I hope you'll find freedom in it.
Until I went to college (hundreds of miles from home), I didn’t truly understand the reality of having friends for a season. But when I left my hometown and started meeting new people at college, I realized how difficult it was to maintain long-distance friendships with my friends back at home. My friends from home and I sometimes stayed in touch, but other friendships fell by the wayside. There were no “friend breakups” or anything dramatic like that. But I definitely had to come to terms with the idea that God sometimes brings people into our lives for a season—and when they leave (or we leave), that’s an opportunity to form friendships with new people instead of a reason to throw a pity party for every single friendship that ends.
Ever since I signed a contract for Real Recovery: What Eating Disorder Recovery Actually Looks Like, I’ve been afraid. Actually, I was afraid before I ever signed the contract. I’ve harbored fears about writing a book, becoming a published author, and finding success. To be more specific, I’ve harbored fears about being unable to write a book, become a published author, and find success. There’s now a checkmark next to “write a book” and “become a published author,” but there’s not yet a checkmark next to “find success.” I realize that success is a subjective concept, so here’s my version of it: being a well-known, well-loved published author. And I haven't found that success yet.