Where God's Word Meets Our Mess
Last night, I had a dream that James* was married—but not to me. He was married to the girl he started dating approximately five seconds after he ghosted me. It was strange to see him wearing a gold wedding band in my dream. But frankly, I’m glad I’m not the one who gave it to him.
Five years ago, I published a post called How I’ve Tasted God’s Goodness Through Not Having a Boyfriend. In that post, I talked about God’s kindness toward me in not giving me a boyfriend because (in short) I wasn’t ready for one. I suppose I could give this post the same name because it’s about losing James*. Although he wasn’t technically my boyfriend, he was the closest thing I’ve had to one. And through the painful experience of losing him, God has again let me taste His goodness.
So I ended Part 1 by sharing the first hard lesson I’ve learned from that relationship: Dating isn’t always fun and romantic. Though that lesson may seem very pessimistic, I shared it to ultimately encourage you to have low expectations about your future dating endeavors. I promise I’ll try to encourage you through the hard lessons I share in this post too.
Honestly, the past several weeks have been pretty terrible. The whole James experience has taught me many hard lessons about dating. Hopefully, the ones I share in this post will help you avoid some heartache as you navigate romantic relationships.
I’m going to be honest with you: I’ve never gone through a breakup, so I don’t know how much it hurts or how long it takes to feel better. But if you’ve broken up with your boyfriend and you regret it, my heart goes out to you. And my hope is that this post will encourage you to keep moving forward instead of turning back.
Even though I haven’t dated anyone, I’ve still had several broken hearts. It feels like unrequited love (i.e., falling for someone who doesn’t share my feelings) has been the theme of my single years. I’ve learned that having a formal relationship isn’t a prerequisite for getting a broken heart. Unfortunately, it’s incredibly easy to get one. If you’ve found that to be true too, this post is for you.
In real life, guys and girls break up and subsequently wrestle with serious doubts and regrets. I’d argue it’s particularly common for girls who break up with their boyfriends to doubt or regret their decisions. It’s simply easier to stay in relationships—even unhealthy ones—than to be alone. But does that mean they should take back their boyfriends?
Tizzie's Tidbits of Truth 