Dear Introverted College Student

Dear Introverted College Student,

Even though I’m not in college anymore, you and I have more in common than you might expect. First, I’ve always been an introvert; so I understand how valuable your alone time is. Second, a few years ago, I was in college—specifically, a small Christian college that was a 10-hour drive from home. I missed my family, I was scared of making friends, and I was too concerned about my grades. (Yeah, #Classic Introverted Freshman.) But in hindsight, I can see so many things I should’ve done differently in college—and this post is my friendly warning to you: Don’t do what I did.

Introverting

During my first two years of college, I avoided social activities at all costs.

Campus picnic? I grabbed my food and got the heck out of there.

Board game night? I stayed for one round of Candy Land and hightailed it back to my dorm room.

Midnight breakfast in the caf? I didn’t even bother going—it was past my bedtime.

I was far more concerned with my comfort level than with, well, anything else (including making friends, meeting guys, and potentially having fun). My freshman year and sophomore year were incredibly structured—early to bed, early to rise, and frustrated with myself if I wasn’t early to bed or early to rise.

To be blunt, the freshman version of Grace was rigid (and not super fun). So again, don’t do what I did.

All the Excuses

Introverted College Student, I see you sitting at your desk with three huge textbooks open. You’re trying to prepare for your American History exam…which isn’t until next month.

When your roommate invites you to join her for dinner or your classmate invites you to a movie, you claim you’re stressed because you need to study. In reality, you are indeed stressed—but not because you need to study. You’re stressed because any and all social situations are (at least initially) highly uncomfortable, and you want to avoid discomfort at all costs.

You’ve used every excuse possible to avoid that discomfort that accompanies social situations:

• “I’m super stressed; I need to study.”
• “I’m exhausted; I need to go to bed.”
• “I don’t feel great; I need to take it easy.”

On and on the excuses go. Trust me, I know all of them.

But I also know college is only for a season—a short, four-year season that wasn’t meant to be spent entirely in the classroom or your dorm room.

Until All the Work Is Finished

Then David said to Solomon his son, “Be strong and courageous and do it. Do not be afraid and do not be dismayed, for the Lord God, even my God, is with you. He will not leave you or forsake you, until all the work for the service of the house of the Lord is finished.” (1 Chronicles 28:20 ESV)

To give you some context, these are the hopeful words David offered to his son, Solomon, as he prepared for the intense work of building the temple. I realize going to college is very different than building a temple, but I took comfort in this verse—especially the last part, when David said God wouldn’t leave Solomon “until all the work for the service of the house of the Lord is finished.” God had a specific job for Solomon to do, and he was called to do it with courage.

Introverted College Student, you also have a specific job to do in college. And despite what academia may tell you, college is not just about studying hard, making good grades, and earning a degree—especially if you’re at a Christian college or at a secular college with a solid Christian campus ministry. Take advantage of this time. Don’t let fear keep you locked up in your room or hidden away in the library. Give activities, events, ministry opportunities, and other social situations a chance.

Don’t let fear and insecurity define your college experience; take courage in the God who is always with you.