Category: Hopes, Dreams, and Fears

To the Girl Who’s Not Doing What She Wanted to Do When She Grew Up

I'm the girl who's sat in a noisy coffee shop as she's plunked the keys on her keyboard, stared at the couples surrounding her, and lost the motivation she thought she had. I'm the girl who's reached out to multiple literary agents and been rejected or ignored by all of them. I'm the girl who's made approximately $60 as an unknown writer for a single Christian magazine. In short, I'm the girl who wanted to be an author but isn't an author.

If You’re Pursuing the Perfect _____

So I have this problem—a problem of pointless pursuits. Pointless pursuits have kind of been the theme of my life, at least in the last few years. I haven’t pursued empty things because people failed to warn me about the consequences. Ignorance wasn’t the issue. My stubbornness was.

When Other People Are Living Your Dream

Others have done what I want to do—become a traditionally published young author of a nonfiction Christian book. Honestly, I envy them. I want their success. But for now, I’m an almost-graduated college student without a published book. And those authors are living my dream.

God Knows Your Deepest Desires

But as I visit church after church and feel like I don’t quite fit, I sigh. As I notice Sean walk past me without acknowledging me, I sigh. As I struggle to find a job that sounds enjoyable, I sigh. I’m just glad that God hears me when I do.

A Conversation with My Try-Harder Self: My 5-Year Blogiversary

But one thing hasn’t changed in five years: I still want to be a writer. And honestly, there's enormous hidden pressure on me to get a book deal, see my name on the front cover, and be famous. This pressure doesn’t come from my parents, sisters, or friends. It comes from my Try-Harder Self—and she’s the dogmatic, degrading, and demanding type.

The Real Reason We Hate COVID-19

The coronavirus makes us angry and frustrated. Thinking about it is simply depressing. Everyone I’ve talked to has somehow been negatively affected by it—whether it’s getting laid off from a job, being sent home from college, or transitioning to teleworking. But I think that there’s an underlying reason why we hate COVID-19 so much.

The Power of “Yes”: My 4-Year Blogiversary

I wouldn’t say that I've “arrived.” I don’t have thousands of blog followers—not even close. I haven’t been published on lots of “big” Christian websites like Christianity Today or Desiring God. I don’t have a book proposal ready (or even started, ahem). But I’m here—and "here" is a good place to be because this is where God has brought me. He's the One who helped me say “yes” to this journey.

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