Five years ago, I published a post called How I’ve Tasted God’s Goodness Through Not Having a Boyfriend. In that post, I talked about God’s kindness toward me in not giving me a boyfriend because (in short) I wasn’t ready for one. I suppose I could give this post the same name because it’s about losing James*. Although he wasn’t technically my boyfriend, he was the closest thing I’ve had to one. And through the painful experience of losing him, God has again let me taste His goodness.
I finally got a taste of requited love—
how it feels for a guy I like
to like me back
to want to get to know me
to ask for my number
to ask me out
to tell me he’s fond of me.
Then I got a taste of rejection—
how it feels for a guy I like
to change his mind about me
to ghost me
to pretend he doesn’t know me
to move on to someone else
to break my heart.
Then I waited to taste the Lord’s goodness—
when all my sadness will stop
my pain will end
my frustration will flee
my anger will evaporate
my bitterness will vanish
my disappointment will become joy.
Then the Lord showed me I can taste His goodness now—
when I seek Him in my pain
give myself grace to grieve
ask for His perfect peace
trust He’ll act in due time
remember what is true
take refuge in Him.
O taste and see that the Lord is good; how blessed is the man who takes refuge in Him! (Psalm 34:8 NASB1995)
*Name has been changed.
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