I know God never promised that I would marry Sean or that I would become a published author or that I would find the perfect church. And He never promised that you would accomplish _____ goal or have _____ desire met. But that doesn’t mean His back is turned away from you. In fact, the opposite is true.
Many young Christian women are on one end of the spectrum or the other when it comes to seeking guys’ attention. They often either quietly attempt to repress their desire for it or boldly communicate it through their words and actions. Neither extreme is good. We can't overcome our craving for a husband—and that’s largely because of the Fall.
After about five-ish years of crushing on Sean (yes, for real) and not receiving any sign of mutual liking, I had had enough. At least I said I had had enough. However, mentally, I was not prepared to let him go.
I felt a twinge of jealousy crawling up my spine as I stared at the words on my computer screen. I couldn’t believe what I was reading. A friend of mine had just received her very first book contract. Why hadn’t I received a book contract? I just couldn’t figure out what I was missing. Was I not doing enough? Was it simply not the right time for me to be a published author? Would it ever be the right time? How many articles and blog posts did I have to write until it was the right time? And then I began to realize the truth of the matter.
I feel unsure about my blogging future because I'm not sure if blogging will take me where I want to go. I don’t know if or when I will accomplish my writing goals. I can’t imagine blogging for five more years and not getting a book contract as a result. I worry that I’ll keep writing and blogging but will never become a well-known author. I fear that my efforts will be wasted. My blog is just one grain of sand on the vast seashore of the World Wide Web. So why do I keep blogging?
I think most people feel like an unbaked bowl of cookie dough for the majority of their lives. We feel like an unbaked bowl of dough, or a blank canvas, or an unfinished math problem. And, for most of our lives, we constantly ask when the dough will be baked, the canvas will be painted, or the problem will be solved. We waste our whole lives trying to figure it out. And, as we try to figure it out, wrestling with questions and doubts and concerns, the cookies are being baked in the oven, the canvas is being painted, and the math problem is being solved—and we don’t even realize it.