Where God's Word Meets Our Mess
Loneliness is rampant in our culture, and the COVID-19 pandemic only made it worse. I've personally experienced loneliness at different times in my life, and it's really rough. However, thankfully, we aren't helpless regarding loneliness. If you're experiencing loneliness, ask yourself the following questions to see what you can do to lessen it.
The year 2020 was a year of virtual everything—meetings, classes, conferences, church services, baby showers, bridal showers, funerals, performances, and more. I hadn't done much video chatting before 2020, but all of a sudden, video chatting became the new normal. While it's great for connecting with friends and family members who live far away, it can never replace in-person interactions and relationships.
You were sure that this was going to be your year for finding true love. You were determined that you wouldn’t spend this Christmas alone. You thought you would definitely have someone to kiss under the mistletoe in 2020. But you wonder if you’ve lost your chance at finding someone to spend the rest of your life with.
Don’t worry—I’m not going to tell you that you’re loved or wanted or valuable whether you have a boyfriend or not. You’ve heard those things a hundred times and already know that those things are true. Instead, I’m going to tell you that it's okay to cry, vent, and even scream if you need to. But I also want you to exhale.
As my friends sort through their romantic relationships—whether they're married, engaged, dating, or almost-dating—I sort through my feelings of emptiness, loneliness, and despair. I cling to my unwantedness. It feels wrong to cling so tightly to such an ugly feeling, but I can’t seem to let it go. I simply want to know this: Am I wanted?
As another girl answered Wyatt's call, I suddenly realized that he was calling the other Grace. I figured that they were already friends and that he wanted to tell her something. I stood in line, feeling slightly embarrassed. And many years later, I often feel the same way.
So my promise for this post is that I won't give you any cookie-cutter answers. No wearing plastic smiles, hiding behind masks, or slapping Band-Aids on our broken hearts. Just real answers for our real doubts about why we've never had real relationships.
I know what it feels like to be the outsider looking in. So that's what this poem is about—watching your friends start dating, get married, and have families. This poem is about feeling stuck on the sidelines and wondering how long you'll be waiting. But the waiting isn't meaningless. You'll see why.
While it's unwise to dwell on the pain of loneliness (especially because we're not actually alone), it's good to recognize that it's not sinful to feel lonely. Loneliness is simply part of being human. You’re not the only one who feels lonely during this season of singleness. I hope that this poem resonates with you and gives you the strength to press on and keep waiting.
Tizzie's Tidbits of Truth 