This One’s for the Girls Who Cried on Valentine’s Day

I realize that Valentine’s Day has come and gone. The leftover candy is now on clearance, and the cheesy valentines are lying in the garbage.

Sadly, for many girls, Valentine’s Day was actually depressing because a boyfriend hadn’t shown up yet. I couldn’t feel less sympathy.

There are millions of single teenagers across the world. But it’s not from lack of trying.

Oh, I have seen girls try. And fail. They’re obsessed with guys who don’t really like them or already have a girlfriend or are simply immature still. They’ve tried to make the “just friends” charade work while hoping and praying that their “friend” doesn’t get a girlfriend. I hear the “Well, I’m just being friendly” excuse all the time. I’m not buying it.

Girls are pouring out their hearts to guys who couldn’t care less about them. THIS NEEDS TO STOP.

Guys are living the dream. We’re obsessing over them, practically bowing down to them and offering them our hearts.

Society tells us that we need a boyfriend to be truly happy in life. Many girls buy into this lie and fight hard to get that special someone.

Let me tell you this: If you were meant to have a boyfriend now, then you would have one.

Girls are trying too hard to make their dreams a reality. We try to force what isn’t meant to be. I know that lots of girls have boyfriends in high school. And those girls may look happy and appear satisfied, but you don’t see the tearful, heart-wrenching breakups that wouldn’t have occurred if those girls had been patient.

Most high-school dating relationships don’t last.

We need to stop feeling pity for ourselves on Valentine’s Day and start being realistic. We need to stop being naïve. When you text a guy constantly, are you really just being “friendly?” I think the correct word is “flirty.” You want a boyfriend, not a buddy. And everyone can see it but your naïve self.

When you initiate conversations with guys at school or church, is it because you’re not really into them? I don’t know about you, but when I don’t like a guy, I try to avoid him, not talk to him.

I don’t buy the lie that when you text a guy first or choose him for your partner in class or pick the seat by him at youth group that you don’t have the slightest of feelings for him.

When we spend hours dreaming about a future boyfriend, our expectations soar. In this fallen world, there is no Mr. Perfect. And the closest guy to your Mr. Perfect probably will not be a teenage boy.

I know that everyone seems to have a boyfriend but you. I get it. I know that attractions are hard to quell. I understand. I know that some high school relationships do last. You’re right.

But why are we dwelling on something that hasn’t happened? If you’ve been in church for a while or read a lot of the Bible, you know that girls are supposed to be the chased, not the chasers. You’re not supposed to initiate a dating relationship. I don’t think that girls can “just be friendly” to guys. I think that most guys will take “friendliness” as a sign of attraction.

We need to help our brothers not to stumble.

Christian guys have a calling to be the leader, the initiator, and the chaser. When we put ourselves out there for the taking, we’re not following our calling; and we’re distracting guys from their own calling.

Dear friend, let the guy come to you. If he’s the right guy for you, then you won’t have to rope him into a relationship. If you have to rope a guy into a relationship, then he ain’t worth your time. He may be cute, but that’s all he’s got going for him. He’s got a bad case of lazy and immaturity (and I’m pretty sure the remedy isn’t you). Don’t put your heart on the line and hope for the best because that precious heart of yours will get crushed.

Watch over your heart with all diligence, for from it flow the springs of life. (Proverbs 4:23 NASB) 

Your heart is precious. Don’t waste it.

Happy Valentine’s Day.

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