Over four years ago (what the heck?), I wrote a post called “Are You Ready for a Romantic Relationship?” for Valentine’s Day. I described some reasons why readers might not be ready for a romantic relationship and then admitted that I wasn’t ready for a romantic relationship myself. Fast forward almost five years, and I figured that it was time to ask an even harder question: are you ready for marriage?
I recently went to Nashville, Tennessee for the first time. It was definitely a culture shock because I had never been to a city exactly like Nashville. But it wasn’t because of the country music or the barbeque or the colorful murals; it was because of the countless bachelorette parties (specifically on party buses and pedal taverns with brides-to-be wearing booty shorts as they shook their booze bottles and their booties as much as physically possible).
And as I stared at the loud, obnoxious, partying brides-to-be who passed by on booze buses, I couldn’t help but wonder, “Are these women going to become great wives overnight?” I was doubtful. Thus, I couldn’t help but also foresee divorces for them, approximately 10-12 months down the road—a sad but probable reality.
I hope I don’t sound like a snob with her high-and-mighty nose in the air because that’s not my intention at all. I have lots of areas in my life that I need to improve in before I think about getting married.
I guess I just didn’t expect to observe such sensual, attention-seeking, and quite honestly ridiculous behavior from soon-to-be-married women. Perhaps, more than anything, I was shocked that such recklessly-behaving women were about to commit to marriage—a commitment that needs to be saturated in sacrificial, unconditional love for an entire lifetime.
But a Virtuous Wife
Sadly, I think the gravity of marriage has decreased over the years. Based on my Nashville trip (and lots of other situations I’ve observed over the years), I don’t think people—even Christians, sadly—realize how serious the commitment of marriage is. I can’t imagine the women shaking their booties on the booze buses had given much thought to it. But as Christians, we’re called to make wise choices—and who (and when) to marry is one of those choices.
Who can find a virtuous wife? For her worth is far above rubies. The heart of her husband safely trusts her; so he will have no lack of gain. She does him good and not evil all the days of her life. (Proverbs 31:10-12 NKJV)
When two people are ready for marriage and treat it with the same seriousness that it has in Scripture, their commitment to God and each other is evident. Waiting to marry someone who’s virtuous—honest, honorable, and trustworthy—means that you’ll be able to depend on each other. People like these are incredibly rare, but they’re worth waiting for.